Sincerely, Lost

There is a line in the movie Thor that states something to the effect of “For the first time in my life, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” This has been a big problem in my life lately, which is probably why this line stood out to me. We always, as human nature demands, look for things we can relate to. I feel like I have followed this trail of breadcrumbs my whole life just to find that it leads to an unfinished trail, and no more signs to follow. A big part of this feeling is career related. Starting as a child, when you think about what you want to do when you grow up, the possibilities are so limited, and most are okay with that. Our answers were, “ I want to be a fireman, or a policeman, or a doctor.” I wanted to be a veterinarian since before I can remember declaring it. I grew up always having at the very least three pets in the house at a time. Now that I am in college, it’s like the more opportunities they inform us off, the more we have to weigh the outcomes, leaving my mind all muddled up with who-knows-what. If only there was someone that could tell us where we’d perform best, or what would make us happy. I always knew to take band in high school because I enjoyed playing the recorder in elementary school and I was good at it. Better than most. But now my world is so much bigger than a class of 25 kids or a graduating class of 400 young adults. Now, I am to be competing with the whole nation. And depending on what field I pursue, maybe the world. Where is the next breadcrumb now? Every time I feel like I might have found my destination, say, material engineering, it turns out that is not where I meant to go. So I backtrack and look for other venues. Right now I am looking at Physical Therapy. But required education for it just heightened. And though I think it is a very respectable career, and one that I admire, I don’t know that it fits me. I also look back on music. I have a great background to go into the music industry. I have played flute for 8 years, and tuba and a little baritone for one. More importantly, I was Drum Major (Field Conductor) for the marching band all four years of my high school career. I attended three camps at the University of Georgia. And I led a band comprised of all four of the high school marching bands in my home county. I was a very blessed person in that area of my life. But the only reason I got that far was because of the breadcrumbs God led the people of my life to leave for me. I just don’t know where to look next though. Can anyone relate?

Sincerely,

Lost without a breadcrumb